From her office at 30 Rock, just steps from the set of Today, which she co-hosts, Sheinelle Jones is on cloud nine. She recently got the news that her new book, Through Mom’s Eyes: Simple Wisdom from Mothers Who Raised Extraordinary Humans, had reached No. 1 on the New York Times bestseller list.
“I just screamed,” the mom of three says. “I’ve had voice problems in the past, so I don’t scream. I don’t even remember the last time I allowed myself to—but this one had just come out. I was so elated.” It was a joyous moment after a year marked by the painful loss of her husband, Uche, and, months later, her beloved grandmother. She began writing the book a couple of years before Uche became ill and completed it after he passed—a promise she made from his hospital room.
Jones got the idea for the book after watching NBA all-star Steph Curry linger after a Today segment, shaking hands and taking time with everyone he met. His kindness stayed with her, and the moment got her thinking: What’s the secret of the mothers behind some of the most beloved people in the world today? How did they raise such remarkable humans?
One answer she kept hearing: Listen, and be fully present. Jones saw that firsthand growing up—she recalls proudly telling her grandmother, who had just picked her up from school, that she’d switched into an easier class. “She turned the music down and drove me right back to school to make sure I took the harder class,” she says. “The next day we were learning Beowulf. I remember thinking, Oh, me and my mouth. I talk for a living—and it really did help shape the trajectory of my education. Thank God she listened to me that day. It changed my life.”
Jones is also quick to note that it’s not just mothers and grandmothers: “We have other women in our lives who pour into us, whether it’s an auntie who may not have children or a Sunday school teacher,” she says. “It’s anyone who nurtures a child and is present in the life of a child.”
We caught up with Jones to discuss her insightful and timely new book about moms. Read on as she reflects on her own journey through grief, growth and motherhood.
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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Reader’s Digest: Your book—which just hit No. 1 on the New York Times bestseller list—has been eight years in the making. How did it all start?
Sheinelle Jones: I started the series when I was new at Today back in 2018. When you get there, you realize everybody has a lane. I started thinking, What’s my thing? If I were to take my truth and wrap my job or purpose around it, what would that look like? I’ve always wanted to be a mom. Before I was a mom, I was everyone’s nanny. I’ve always loved kids. And I thought if I could pour into women, I’m also helping kids.
I remember watching Steph Curry [off set] when no one was watching. He was shaking hands and signing autographs. Just a really nice guy. And I thought, What did his mother feed him? I laughed because everyone else is looking at the celebrity, and I’m over here with three kids at home, wondering if I’m doing it right.
So I started the series “Through Mom’s Eyes,” and Steph’s mom, Sonya Curry, was my first “yes.” After talking with her about the good times, the challenging times and what she would do differently, I realized this was really cool. I was getting wisdom about raising kids, but also for myself as a woman. Then it became Shaq’s mom, Lady Gaga, Lin-Manuel Miranda, Kevin Durant.
Reader’s Digest: You’ve got such a mix of moms in the book: Oracene Price, Serena and Venus Williams’s mom; Kay McConaughey, Matthew McConaughey’s mom; Denis Jonas, the Jonas brothers’ mom. What was the process of putting together all of their stories?
Sheinelle Jones: Honestly, I didn’t hold back. Any mom I talked to, I learned something from. I would’ve done more—it’s just that once my husband, Uche, got sick, I could only do so much.
Every woman I’ve talked to, I’ve walked away with something valuable to share—whether it’s about the X’s and O’s of parenting, chores and no chores, discipline, divorce (because my mom’s been divorced twice), faith—all of these themes. Sure, it is that. But really, I walked away in awe of their resilience and strength.
There are so many things that women do and we almost take it for granted. Maybe on Mother’s Day we say thank you, but these women poured themselves into these folks. We see the musician, the concerts, the Academy Awards—but I know, because I have two boys who play soccer—you don’t get Saturday mornings for a decade or two. These women poured into them for so long.
Reader’s Digest: They also shared what they would have done differently.
Sheinelle Jones: Most of them talk about how if they could do anything differently, it would be to continue to pour into themselves and their own dreams. Wanda Durant talked about hiding behind her kids for years. Shaq’s mom got her degree in her 40s. So it’s never too late. Yes, I’m talking to moms, but I’m also talking to women, reminding them to take care of themselves and not forget their own dreams.
Reader’s Digest: So much happened in your personal life during the time you put together your book. As your husband, Uche, was battling brain cancer, he made sure you kept writing.
Sheinelle Jones: The book was supposed to come out last April. But after he was diagnosed and went into hospice, there was no way I could have a book come out at that time, so I tabled it. After he passed, it was already finished, but I felt like I couldn’t write a book about motherhood from an honest place without acknowledging the biggest rock of my life and motherhood journey. I went back and rewrote the beginning and the end.
Right after his first brain surgery, he asked me, “Where’s your laptop?” And I was like, “What?” That was the last thing I cared about at that time. But ultimately, he wanted me to keep going. He didn’t want me to stop my dreams. I kept my promise.
Reader’s Digest: Your grandmother was such a big inspiration to you, and you lost her last year too. What did it mean to you that she got to read parts of your book?
Sheinelle Jones: My grandmother lived in Wichita, Kansas, and would say, “Send me the chapters as you get them done.” I would send her chapters off my computer. She wrote a memoir when I was in high school, and it’s in libraries in my hometown. I feel like I am on her shoulders in that regard. She was my biggest cheerleader. But it’s hard because when I found out I made the New York Times bestseller list, No. 1, my first calls would’ve been to Uche and Grandmama. But I talk about them in the book, and it’s clearly in their honor.
Reader’s Digest: Do you have a favorite story from one of the moms you interviewed?
Sheinelle Jones: That’s like picking a favorite child. Kay McConaughey was the funniest to me—unapologetically feisty, in her 80s, still dreaming. She joked about wanting to be a Golden Girl and asked if I knew a casting agent, and I realized she wasn’t kidding. I loved that she was still wanting to do new things and challenge herself.
Alma Wahlberg is one I’ll forever cherish. I remember walking up to her house and thinking, Oh, my God, if my younger self knew I was at the New Kids on the Block’s mom’s house. She shared funny stories about raising her boys, but also her struggles. She was funny, but also very vulnerable. She shared journal entries with me. After that interview, I was so moved, I think I missed my flight. She reminded me that even through tough times, even if your child messes up or embarrasses you, we love our kids through it. I didn’t want to write a book where everything is perfect—it’s not that at all.
Reader’s Digest: Has writing this book changed you?
Sheinelle Jones: I’m more unapologetic about what I want to do, what I don’t want to do and where I give my time. After interviewing so many women who wish they had done that sooner, shame on me if I don’t apply it. I’ve dealt with one of the worst things that could happen, so I move with more clarity. After loss, everything feels more vivid. And as it pertains to this book, what a gift it is to have children and to be a mother.
Reader’s Digest: After taking in what these moms told you, what does being a good mom mean to you now?
Sheinelle Jones: Being more intentional and as present as possible. I slow down more. I’ll get in bed with my daughter or call my kids into the kitchen while I’m cooking chicken fingers. I’m more intentional with eye contact and asking how they feel. There’s no template. Some of my strongest memories with my mom were if I got in trouble. She would sit me down and talk to me, and I would cry because I disappointed her. Looking back, I realize I valued that one-on-one time. That connection mattered.
Reader’s Digest: What do you wish moms would do for themselves?
Sheinelle Jones: Just give themselves grace. Without a gift or a holiday, allow yourself a moment to be proud of how far you’ve come. We’re doing the best we can. Really feel that—not just say it.
Reader’s Digest: How do you stay resilient on hard days?
Sheinelle Jones: I struggle. I was crying three hours ago because I forgot to register my son for soccer tryouts. But I’ve learned that emotions are like waves—[they] will pass. So I don’t run from feeling sad. I let myself feel it, breathe, hold on and know it will pass.
Reader’s Digest: What do you hope readers take away from your book?
Sheinelle Jones: That motherhood—and life—is a gift, even on the hard days, and that we’re not alone in it.
Reader’s Digest: You all seem like a very tight-knit family on Today and have been through a lot ups and downs recently. How are you all doing?
Sheinelle Jones: I’m so proud of us. I mean that with such sincerity. I’m so proud of our resilience and our faith and our sisterhood. I say sisterhood, but there’s also brotherhood with Craig and Al and Carson. They have become family. And it’s not for the cameras. It’s not like people knew that Al helped me on mornings, bringing sandwiches to my kids when they were in the hospice with their dad. That is because we’re family. And I think we’re fiercely protective of each other.
Reader’s Digest: Are you going to do a sequel to the book? Is there another topic or project you have on the horizon?
Sheinelle Jones: It’s like the “next thing.” You know what it reminds me of? When Uche and I were together for 20 years before we got married. I was 19 when we met. As soon as we got married, it was like, “When are you going to have kids?” And then when you have the first kid, it’s like, “Oh, when are you going to have another?” And then I had twins. If we’re not careful, we’re constantly wishing for the next.
A huge part of my book is to not wish the moment away. I want to practice that now, in real time. I’m going to try to be so hyper-present and grateful and thankful. I’ve been through so much that I think I owe it to myself to do what I’m asking the other moms to do, which is just to be fully in it and to enjoy it. And hopefully if I move in that way, the next move will be a bit clearer.
Reader’s Digest: On the day your book launched, your kids—Kayin, Uche and Clara Josephine—surprised you on set with flowers and a framed quote of one of your grandmother’s sayings: “I’m doing the best I can by the light I have to see by.” What was that moment like for you?
Sheinelle Jones: My grandmother had so many sayings and quotes, and she would say them several times a day. You couldn’t have a phone conversation with my grandmother without all of those sayings. And that’s one of them. She would say it in funny times, and she would say it in tough times. I’m looking at the quote in my office now. Grandmama would just be over the moon. I talked to her every day.
When Uche got sick, there were times when I didn’t talk to her as much because we were in it and I didn’t want to worry her, but she knew. She was at his service. The last picture I have of us alone together, she was wiping away my tears. I wouldn’t be here without her. She was 96. People say, “Oh, she lived a long, full life.” She did, but anyone who’s lost someone knows it still hurts.
Reader’s Digest: What advice would you give someone who wants to know how to start writing about their family’s memories?
Sheinelle Jones: I wish I would have done it sooner. I talked to my grandfather only one time [about his personal stories and memories]. He was a trailblazer in medicine, he was one of the only physicians of color in my hometown and his father was a physician. The fact that I’m telling you my grandfather’s father was a physician as an African American man at that time—it was huge. I know now there were so many stories that he could have shared. If you have relatives who have stories to share, even if it’s just taking out your phone in a voice memo … I always thought I had more time.
Even if we don’t ever want to publish it, but we just want it for the sake of family history, I would strongly encourage people to get their phone, call their oldest living relative and just sit down and ask: What was their favorite thing to read? What was their favorite thing to do? Next thing you know, you’re hearing about some book that you’d never heard of that you go to your library and find. And we just never thought to ask Aunt Susie what was the book that she read in school or what was her favorite game. There’s just so much wisdom and depth in the people around us and especially in our elders. I just think a lot of that goes untapped.
Sheinelle Jones’s book, Through Mom’s Eyes: Simple Wisdom from Mothers Who Raised Extraordinary Humans, is available now.
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