I recently texted my 21-year-old son to ask what time he was coming over for dinner. His reply? “k”—just the letter k. No capitalization, no punctuation, no context (and, most notably, no actual answer). Was he mad at me? Had I done something wrong? Had he gotten in a terrible car accident and broken all his fingers and all he could type was one letter with his nose? (Any other moms go directly to catastrophic spirals?) I spent 10 minutes analyzing that single letter before my 16-year-old daughter walked by and said, “Mom, that just means ‘fine.’ Chill.”
Meanwhile, when I text my great aunt, I receive responses that read like formal correspondence: “Dear Charlotte, I was so delighted to see your pictures on Facebook. Your kids are getting so big. You look just like your grandmother. With love, Aunt Cathy.” Ignoring the fact that this text should have been a Facebook comment, there’s the issue that she signs her texts. Every. Single. Time.
Welcome to the wild world of multigenerational texting, where a period can be passive-aggressive, “lol” doesn’t actually mean you’re laughing and the thumbs-up emoji might as well be a declaration of war. “What we are witnessing is an evolution of social norms, and the ones who bristle against it are the ones who are having the hardest time adjusting,” says Patrice Williams-Lindo, a technology trends expert and the founder of Career Nomad. “The future of connection requires us to honor human nuance in all forms of communication.”
So how do you honor that nuance without accidentally offending your boss, bewildering your grandma or making your teenager think you’re having a breakdown? I spoke with Williams-Lindo and multigenerational workplace expert Lindsay Pollak about how to decode how every generation texts. Read on for the details that will keep you sane.
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What’s so hard about texting other generations?
Humans have been communicating since smoke signals—and probably misreading those too. (Does one long puff mean war cry or fish fry?) And regardless of whether you’re using charcoal scratches or cutting-edge tech, the challenge comes down to one word: expectations. Each generation learned to communicate in a different technological landscape, and those early experiences shaped their texting DNA.
“I think the broad challenge is differences of expectation of what communication is appropriate,” explains Pollak, who is also the author of The Remix: How to Lead and Succeed in the Multigenerational Workplace. Just like if you were working with someone in another country, she says, “their language isn’t better or worse. It’s just different. And so we have to figure out how to communicate, given that.”
Think about it: Baby Boomers came of age writing letters and making phone calls. They learned that proper punctuation and complete sentences signaled respect and professionalism. Gen Xers straddled the analog and digital worlds, mastering email as their primary written communication. Millennials grew up with instant messaging and early texting, developing shortcuts and emoticons. And Gen Z? They’ve never known a world without phones, tablets, laptops and smart-everything, where communication happens in rapid-fire bursts across multiple platforms simultaneously.
Why does getting it right matter? Because miscommunication breeds frustration, damaged relationships and unnecessary anxiety. When your Millennial co-worker sends you a thumbs-up emoji and you interpret it as dismissive, or when your Boomer dad thinks your lack of a greeting means you’re upset, everyone loses. Understanding generational texting styles isn’t about perpetuating damaging stereotypes or changing who you are—it’s about being understood and making others feel understood too, Pollak says.
Williams-Lindo agrees. “Etiquette without empathy is just elitism,” she says.
What’s each generation’s texting style?
Every generation has developed its own texting dialect, complete with unique punctuation preferences, response-time expectations and unwritten rules. Here’s your decoder ring for navigating texts from anyone born between 1946 and 2025. (OK, maybe 1-year-olds aren’t texting quite yet, but if trends continue, I predict we’ll soon be getting messages from inside the womb.)
Baby Boomers (born 1946–1964)
Boomers text like they’re writing a polite letter that happens to be delivered instantly. Expect full sentences, proper punctuation and often a greeting and sign-off. My elderly neighbor once texted me: “Hello Charlotte, I hope this message finds you well. I wanted to inquire about the time of Sunday’s gathering. Please respond at your earliest convenience. Best regards, Jim (from next door).” Sir, this is a text message, not a cover letter.
This formality isn’t stuffiness—it’s respect. Boomers “grew up having to communicate primarily in person and by phone, and then written letters after that, and so they have decades of experience in verbal and written formal communications,” Pollak explains. That translates to texting that feels more like correspondence than conversation.
Boomers use texting deliberately, reserving it for practical information rather than idle chitchat. They’re more likely to call for anything complex or emotional. They may also text you, then leave a voicemail asking if you got the text, then call to follow up on the voicemail. And if you don’t respond within a few hours? Expect a “Did you get my message?” follow-up—because clearly you’ve been kidnapped.
But while some Boomers avoid text-speak entirely, others have enthusiastically adopted it … with their own interpretations. (My aunt-in-law once signed off a text with “LOL” because she thought it meant “lots of love.” The text was about my husband’s grandmother’s funeral arrangements. Rest in peace, Grandma. LOL.)
Next time you text a Boomer: Don’t panic if their message feels formal or takes a while to arrive. Include a greeting if you’re initiating contact, and don’t be afraid to use complete sentences—they’ll appreciate it. Emphasize politeness and information.
Generation X (born 1965–1980)
Gen Xers are the translators of the texting world, fluent in both formal and casual—and both digital and analog—communication. “We knew the analog world because we started when the Boomers were leading the workplace and technology changed really rapidly, starting with email for our generation,” says Pollak, herself a Gen Xer. “We had to be adaptable.”
This is the generation that learned to type on actual typewriters, then word processors, then computers, then phones. They’ve adapted so many times that they can code-switch between texting styles almost unconsciously. They might text the boss with proper capitalization and their friends with casual abbreviations in the same hour.
Gen X tends to fall somewhere in the middle on most texting conventions. They use punctuation but aren’t militant about it. They understand emojis but don’t overuse them. They appreciate efficiency but won’t be offended by a friendly opener. Pollak jokes that she’ll never give up email: “You can pull email out of my cold, dead hands.” Many Gen Xers feel similarly attached to texting conventions that balance formality with convenience.
One quirk? Gen Xers often use ellipses … a lot … in texts … sometimes to trail off … sometimes for emphasis … sometimes for no reason at all. (I’m doing it right now. I can’t stop. It’s a sickness.)
Next time you text a Gen Xer: They’re pretty flexible, so you don’t need to overthink it. They can handle casual or formal communication. Just don’t expect them to adopt every new texting trend immediately—they’ve survived too many technology shifts to jump on every bandwagon.
Millennials (born 1981–1996)
Millennials were the guinea pigs of digital communication, coming of age alongside AIM (AOL Instant Messenger), early texting and social media. They developed many texting conventions that younger generations now take for granted—including widespread use of emojis and gifs and the use of “lol” as punctuation rather than an indicator of actual laughter.
Millennials were also the most attacked for their early and enthusiastic adoption of texting, which can make them more self-conscious or worried when they text people of other generations, Pollak says. Perhaps as a result, Millennials tend to be highly attuned to tone in text messages, using emojis and softening language to ensure their messages don’t come across as harsh. Millennials are master qualifiers. They’ll write “Just wanted to check in!” or “No worries if not!” or “Sorry to bother you but …” before making even the simplest request. This isn’t insecurity—it’s a communication style designed to maintain warmth in a medium that lacks vocal tone.
Expect Millennials to use emojis strategically, favor texting over calling and respond relatively quickly (though they’ll understand if you don’t). They’re comfortable with abbreviations but typically use them selectively rather than constantly. Oh, and they’ve never met an exclamation point they didn’t love!!
Next time you text a Millennial: Feel free to be casual, but don’t be alarmed by their softened language—they’re just trying to be friendly. If they add a smiley face to a work text, they’re not being unprofessional; they’re trying to convey warmth.
Generation Z (born 1997–2012)
Oh, Gen Z. The generation that made capital letters aggressive, turned the period into a weapon, refuses to say hello when answering the phone and made avoiding voicemail into a sport. Understanding their texting style requires releasing everything you thought you knew about written communication. Williams-Lindo explains that what older generations might see as poor etiquette is actually “a shift in how Gen Z navigates power, privacy and presence in real time. For a generation raised on asynchronous communication—DMs, voice notes, video messages—immediate engagement can feel jarring or performative.”
Gen Z texts in fragments, often across multiple rapid-fire messages rather than one complete thought. They use lowercase letters because capitalization feels too intense, too formal, too much like they’re trying too hard. They’ve developed an entire vocabulary of tone indicators, including emojis, gifs and … silence.
The period is public enemy No. 1. To Gen Z, ending a text with a period signals anger, passive-aggressiveness or, at minimum, extreme seriousness. “Ok.” means something very different from “ok” or “okk” or “okayyy.” (Yes, the number of letters and their capitalization all carry meaning. It’s exhausting, I know.) It’s so ubiquitous, though, that I’ve stopped using periods when texting my kids. In a way, it almost feels like I’m keeping the conversation open, or at least that’s what I tell myself.
Then there’s all the Gen Z slang that changes as fast as internet meme culture spits them out. When I asked my daughter to explain “cheugy” to me, she said I was “cooked” and walked away. I still don’t fully understand what happened.
Next time you text a Gen Zer: Relax your grammar, drop the periods at the end of sentences and don’t expect (or send) formal greetings. If they send you a one-word lowercase response, they’re not mad; that’s just how they communicate. And if they don’t respond immediately, that’s fine too. As Williams-Lindo puts it: “Gen Z isn’t killing etiquette—they’re reclaiming it on their own terms.”
Generation Alpha (born 2013–2024)
Gen Alpha is just beginning to enter the texting world, and they’re bringing a whole new dimension: AI. Yes, AI is already being used in-app when texting, and you can expect it to start playing an even greater role in communications. “All the judgments that we have right now and questions about AI, it just simply will be [normal] for Gen Alphas,” says Pollak. “It’s not good or bad—it’s like asking you, ‘Do you think electricity is good?’ You’re like, ‘I don’t know; it’s just there.'”
The oldest Gen Alphas are around 13 now, so their texting habits are shaping the next evolution of communications. Early observations suggest they communicate heavily through voice notes, video (a la Snapchat) and shared content (TikToks, Reels) rather than traditional text. They’re growing up with voice assistants and AI chatbots as normal parts of life, which will inevitably shape how they communicate with humans too.
Many Gen Alpha kids are also developing sophisticated understandings of digital communication earlier than any previous generation. This age group often uses multiple platforms simultaneously, maintaining different communication styles for different audiences—a complexity that took older generations decades to develop.
Next time you text a Gen Alpha: Skip the typing, and instead text a voice note. And be prepared for communication styles we haven’t even invented yet. They’re digital natives in ways that even Gen Zers aren’t, so flexibility is key.
What should you keep in mind when texting other generations?
The golden rule of multigenerational texting is simple, according to Pollak: Assume good intentions. That period at the end of your Boomer boss’s text isn’t passive-aggressive—it’s punctuation. Your Gen Z niece’s lowercase, unpunctuated response isn’t rude—it’s just her communication style. “Instead of saying something’s good or bad, right or wrong, say it’s different, and I want to learn more,” Pollak advises.
Clarity beats assumptions every time. “We make a lot of assumptions,” Pollak says. “So it’s good to ask questions or reiterate things to make sure everyone’s on the same page.” So if you say “get in touch” and mean “call,” but the recipient interprets it as “text,” no one is wrong—you just weren’t clear.
Sometimes, you might need to adapt your style to meet someone where they are. When I text my kids, I’ve learned to drop the periods and keep things brief. When I text my older neighbor, I include greetings and sign-offs because it makes him happy. Neither approach is wrong—they’re just different audiences requiring different communication styles. But there’s also a point where you accept that generational differences exist and move on. You may even start to see the texting quirks as charming instead of irritating. “The more time we spend on understanding the nuance of different groups in the workplace and in the world, the better and stronger multigenerational communities we can build,” Williams-Lindo says.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go analyze my son’s latest text. He sent a skull emoji followed by a wilting rose emoji. My daughter says it means he’s laughing and not in a car accident. I hope.
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Sources:
- Patrice Williams-Lindo, founder of Career Nomad and workplace trend forecaster; email interview, Nov. 26, 2025
- Lindsey Pollak, multigenerational workplace expert; phone interview, Nov. 24, 2025
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