If you’ve been seeing terms like rizz, soft launch, delusionship or sneaky link float through your feed—or you’ve listened in on a group of teens and 20-somethings—and realized you’re not really sure what those words mean, you’re in good company. Even those of us who are chronically online can miss a few updates. Dating slang moves fast, and Gen Z is leading the linguistic revolution.
To learn what Gen Z dating terms are on the rise (and what they mean), I went straight to the source: actual high school and college students and young professionals who live and breathe this vocabulary. I put out a call on social media and contacted all my friends and relatives with Gen Z kids. To my delight (and surprise), 52 individuals between the ages of 13 and 28 responded to my survey, with definitions, explanations and (occasionally) gentle corrections.
But understanding the slang is only half the story. To decode what this language actually means for modern relationships, I turned to Cailey Griffin, a certified relationship coach, health journalist and Harvard-trained expert in human development. “Gen Z has done the work of fostering healthy emotional connections. They’re naming dating patterns that older generations just tolerated,” she says.
In other words, Gen Z dating terms aren’t just cute—they’re revealing. Read on to decode the dialect of the under-28 set.
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What Gen Z dating terms does everyone need to know?
Here’s your glossary of the dating slang singles hear, use and low-key hate but say anyway, decoded by Gen Zers themselves.
-ship
As in: Situationship, delusionship, eyecontactship, imaginationship, etc.
What it means: A vague, semi-fictional or undefined romantic dynamic
- Situationship: A real but undefined romantic/sexual dynamic
- Delusionship: A one-sided or imagined relationship based on fantasy
- Eyecontactship: When you keep making loaded eye contact with someone and pretend it’s meaningful
- Imaginationship: A relationship that exists entirely in your head
How to use it: “We’ve barely spoken, so honestly it’s just an imaginationship at this point.” —Alyssa, 19, college student
The -ship suffix is the humorous way Gen Z labels any romantic dynamic that defies traditional naming—it’s basically a taxonomy of the undefined. The term before -ship, whether situation, delusion or imagination, helps clarify what kind of undefined relationship it is. “Everyone I know is in some kind of situationship,” says Mia, 24, a speech-language pathologist, noting that most people her age float between casual and committed.
Talking, talking stage
What it means: The pre-relationship gray zone
How to use it: “We’ve been talking forever, but it’s still nothing official.” —Julianna, 19, college student
The nebulous “getting to know you” period has ballooned into its own semi-permanent relationship status. Isobel, a 16-year-old high school student, describes it as “the stage before a relationship where people are getting to know each other, usually through texting or seeing each other casually in person.”
Friends with benefits (FWB)
What it means: Friends who hook up without a label
How to use it: “They’re FWB, but you can tell they’re catching feelings.” —Victoria, 21, college student
FWB isn’t a new slang word, but Gen Z approaches it with clear-eyed realism. “FWB always gets messy. Always,” says Victoria.
Hook up
What it means: Get intimate with someone
How to use it: “We hooked up … whatever that means.” —Alyssa
Hook up continues to be intentionally vague. It’s an all-purpose term that allows people to signal intimacy without defining what actually happened. It could be sex (says Sami, 26, a lawyer); it could be just kissing. Its flexibility makes it useful but also confusing. Esme, 26, a marketing account manager, notes the generational divide: “For Gen Z, it means sex or sex-adjacent. For older generations, it means dating.”
Sneaky link
What it means: A low-key hookup kept quiet on purpose
How to use it: “I’m seeing my sneaky link later.” —Ella, 16, high school student
The sneaky link is the person you see on the down-low—no labels, no posting, no evidence. It’s casual, fun and usually temporary.
Cuffed
What it means: In a committed relationship
How to use it: “Everyone gets cuffed as soon as it gets cold.” —Victoria
If someone is cuffed, says Sierra, 26, a caregiver, “they’re taken.” Cuffing season “is the fall-to-winter stretch when people seem to pair off,” says Briana, 26, an audiologist.
Building a roster
What it means: Keeping multiple dating options open
How to use it: “I’m still building my roster. No starters yet.” —Alyssa
A roster is a lineup of people you’re casually talking to or considering. Victoria says a roster “keeps you from obsessing over one person too soon.”
Locked in
What it means: Fully committed
How to use it: “Now we’re locked in.” —Victoria
Brianna, a 14-year-old high school student, uses locked in for when “you feel like it’s going places.” It describes total commitment and helps differentiate between casual dating and something real.
Green flag, red flag, beige flag
What it means: Good sign, bad sign, quirky-neutral sign
How to use it: “He’s communicative—that’s a major green flag.” —Victoria
Flags are the diagnostic tools of modern dating. “Gen Z is able to decipher a person based on their behavior, actions, words, etc., and then call the entire person a red flag or green flag,” says Julianna. A green flag is a healthy behavior; a red flag is a warning; a beige flag is a quirky-but-neutral trait.
Breadcrumbing
What it means: Giving someone just enough attention to keep them hooked
How to use it: “He texts once a week. That’s breadcrumbing.” —Ella
Esme explains the intent: “People who breadcrumb have no intent of keeping the partner, but they give just enough attention to keep the person intrigued.”
Love bombing
What it means: Over-the-top affection meant to manipulate
How to use it: “If someone is love bombing you, they’re too into you too fast. Run.” —Victoria
Love bombing—over-the-top affection early on—is widely recognized among Gen Z as a major red flag. Julia, 24, a sustainability educator, says, “It’s a manipulation tactic.”
Ghosting
What it means: Disappearing without a word
How to use it: “People ghost instead of having hard conversations.” —Ella
Sami defines ghosting as: “stopped talking/seeing someone without being honest about how you’re feeling.” Disappearing suddenly and silently is the villain of Gen Z dating and the default exit strategy.
Snapping
What it means: Flirty messaging on Snapchat
How to use it: “We were snapping all night.” —Julia, 20, college student
To snap someone is to interact with them on Snapchat, which in many Gen Z circles is the primary platform for flirting. “Snapchat is literally the dating app of high school,” says Lila, a 17-year-old high school student.
Hard launch, soft launch
What it means: Revealing a partner on social media
How to use it: “Did you see she hard launched her new man?” —Callum, 20, college student
Soft launching a partner (posting a hand, a shadow, a meal across from someone) signals that you’re seeing someone without revealing who and is “safer and less embarrassing if it ends,” says Alyssa. “Hard launching a relationship is when one posts their new significant other on social media so everyone is able to see who the person is,” explains Lila.
The ick
What it means: Sudden, irreversible turn-off
How to use it: “If he’s not hygienic, I get the ick immediately.” —Mia
Getting the ick is experiencing a sudden, irreversible drop in attraction triggered by something small: the way he eats, the use of a word, being rude to a barista. “It’s something that a guy does that makes him unattractive to me,” says Brianna. Campbell, a 17-year-old high school student, says the ick is “a specific behavior that gives you a visceral cringe feeling.”
Rizz
What it means: Charisma
How to use it: “That dude has no rizz.” —Callum
Rizz is effortless charm: the ability to flirt smoothly without trying. “It’s how much game you have,” says Briana. It’s less about rehearsed lines and more about vibe.
Baddie
What it means: A confident, stylish woman
How to use it: “She looks like a total baddie today.” —Alyssa
A baddie is “someone hot,” says Sophia, a 14-year-old high school student. Aesthetics matter, but attitude matters more.
Fine shyt
What it means: Someone extremely attractive
How to use it: “He’s fine shyt.” —Adriana, 14, high school student
Fine shyt is used to describe a “person you think is attractive and you like,” says 16-year-old high school student Aubrey.
Performative male
What it means: An inauthentic guy who is peacocking in the hopes of attracting someone
How to use it: “He’s reading books in public and drinking matcha—what a performative male.” —Lena, 21, college student
A performative male is a guy acting hypersensitive or hypermasculine for an audience instead of being himself. Victoria offers the perfect example: “Dude doing push-ups in the club? Performative male.”
Chopped
What it means: Ugly/unattractive
How to use it: “She’s so chopped—ew!” —Callum
One who is chopped is ugly. It’s blunt, just like Gen Z.
What do these terms tell us about Gen Z’s take on dating?
Between Gen Z daters’ responses and Griffin’s professional opinion, we can learn a lot from just a handful of Gen Z relationship terms. Here’s what the slang says about their approach to romance.
According to Gen Z
Across the responses, Gen Z made it clear that slang isn’t just language; it’s a coping tool, a way to set boundaries and a reflection of how they navigate modern dating. Gen Z dating terms help us understand what this generation values in a relationship.
They use humor as a buffer
Humor is one of Gen Z’s most effective tools for dealing with romantic uncertainty. “Slang makes it easier to talk about feelings,” says Justin, a 25-year-old teacher. Slang acts as a buffer: It keeps things light, lowers pressure and makes vulnerable conversations feel safer.
They’re honest about boundaries
Despite the ambiguity in their language, Gen Z is up front about what they want. Therapy language, memes and social media discourse have made red flags and boundaries easier to talk about.
They seek out emotional protection
Slang also functions as emotional armor, a way to create distance and protect yourself from getting hurt. Many say it helps them stay casual until they feel safe.
This ties into why Gen Z is often labeled “commitment hesitant.” It’s not because they fear commitment itself but because they want independence, clarity and emotional safety before fully investing. As several respondents noted, they’d rather be cautious than settle.
According to a relationship expert
Griffin sums up Gen Z’s dating worldview simply: “intentional.” Their slang reflects clarity, self-awareness and a commitment to relationships that genuinely support their well-being, she says.
They’re redefining commitment
Gen Zers aren’t afraid of commitment; they’re reframing it. Casual dating, Griffin says, works when each party “is clear on what it is and what it is not,” and deeper relationships are built on transparency rather than pressure.
They call out confusing or unhealthy dynamics
Griffin notes that terms like situationship highlight Gen Z’s ability to identify patterns that “have existed in a gray area for other generations.” A situationship often feels like a relationship without definition, leaving people in “anxiety and confusion.” Naming it shows Gen Z “has enough emotional intelligence to call out harmful but normalized dynamics,” she says.
Their social-media language reflects vulnerability
Soft and hard launches show a deliberate approach to visibility, Griffin says. A soft launch signals, “I have a special person in my life, but it’s not your business who it is yet.” A hard launch is more vulnerable: “Hey, I’m dating someone I like, or love, and I’m happy.” It’s putting yourself out there, even with the anxiety of things not working out.
Therapy culture shapes how they talk about dating
Griffin says therapy has given Gen Z “the language and tools to communicate their interests and boundaries,” plus “the ability to notice when something isn’t working.”
From ghosting to love bombing, Gen Z has found new ways to describe the chaos of dating. Learning the slang won’t just help you keep up; it might even give you a few laughs along the way.
About the expert
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Source:
- Cailey Griffin, MEd, MS, certified relationship coach and Harvard-trained expert in human development; email interview, Nov. 24, 2025
The post Here’s What Those Gen Z Dating Terms Actually Mean appeared first on Reader's Digest.
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