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They Created a Family Compound—And Now Have a Built-In Village

When the Pingrees bought a run-down apartment building in downtown Boston back in 1975, their families thought they’d lost their minds. Seventy thousand dollars for a dilapidated building in an older part of town? (Try not to cry thinking about those 1975 real estate prices.) But here we are, 50 years later, and that “crazy” investment has become the ultimate family compound—beautifully renovated, expanded from four smaller units to three larger ones and now home base to not just the original buyers but also three grown sons, three daughters-in-law and a whopping 10 grandchildren.

“Yeah, it’s basically controlled chaos,” laughs Eben Pingree, 43, the middle son, who’s been living in the Beacon Hill building for the past 13 years. “But it’s the best kind of chaos.”

The Pingrees are part of a growing trend. Multigenerational homes—households with three or more generations living together—are becoming increasingly common across America as families seek financial relief, stronger support systems and deeper connections in an age of isolation. Keep reading to find out how they make it work … and how you could too.

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Living with family isn’t just for sitcoms

Pingree and his two brothers all grew up in this building, went to the same college in Western Massachusetts, moved together to California for their early careers (as one does when you’re that close) and then all eventually boomeranged back to Boston. And then? They all moved back in with their parents.

Pingree and his younger brother each took vacant apartments in the family complex, while his older brother found a place in a nearby neighborhood. Now the setup looks like this: Pingree, his wife and their three kids (ages 11, 7 and 4) live on the top floor. His younger brother, his wife and their three kids (ages 10, 8 and 4) live on the bottom floor. Their parents are sandwiched in between on the middle floor. And Pingree’s big brother lives nearby with his wife and four kids (13, 11 and 8-year-old twins).

That’s 10 cousins, all attending the same neighborhood school their dads went to, all within shouting—or in the case of the 4-year-olds, sprinting—distance of each other.

“My 4-year-old can literally open the door and run downstairs to see his best friend whenever he wants,” Pingree says. “How many kids are that lucky?”

But the decision to move back wasn’t entirely straightforward. After finishing graduate school 13 years ago, Pingree admits he had reservations about moving back in with his parents, and his wife was similarly hesitant. But the draw of a centrally located apartment with reduced rent in one of the most expensive cities in the country helped them overcome their worries.

“Looking back, both of us are so glad we did it,” he says.

His brothers felt the same pull. The close relationship they’d always shared made the arrangement feel natural rather than awkward. “I think the fact that we grew up best friends is the main reason our arrangement works as well as it does,” Pingree says.

Multigenerational homes are on the rise

Pingree is passionate about the benefits of multigenerational relationships. “Way too many people overlook how important extended family is to our mental, emotional and physical well-being, especially for children,” he says. “The U.S. Surgeon General declared an epidemic of loneliness. People are becoming more and more isolated, and living with family is one of the most powerful ways to combat that.”

Pingree’s conviction reflects a broader shift happening across America. The number of people living in multigenerational households has quadrupled over the past 50 years, according to Pew Research Center—that’s nearly 60 million Americans, or about 1 in 5 people. The jump is even more striking among young adults: a quarter of those ages 25 to 34 now live with parents or grandparents, compared with less than 1 in 10 back in 1971.

And the trend keeps growing. The National Association of Realtors reports that 17% of homebuyers in 2025 specifically purchased multigenerational homes—up from 14% just a year earlier. Gen X is leading the way, with 21% choosing to live with extended family.

A response to the housing crisis

Why the surge? The math is pretty simple: Housing has become crushingly unaffordable. Home prices have climbed to six times the median income—double what they were 20 years ago. Americans now need to earn about $141,000 to buy a median-priced home, but the average salary is roughly half that. Nearly three-quarters of U.S. households are priced out of today’s housing market entirely, according to the National Association of Home Builders.

“Financially speaking, it is economical and saves money to have a multigenerational household,” explains Isabel Tom, author of The Value of Wrinkles: A Young Perspective on How Loving the Old Will Change Your Life and creator of the Grandkid Investigator Kit.

An answer to child and elder care needs

It’s not just about housing affordability (or the lack thereof). The cost of child care has skyrocketed, often rivaling mortgage payments. And senior housing and care facilities carry price tags that put them out of reach for many families. Generational living eases the burden.

“Senior housing is costly, so financially speaking, it is economical and saves money to have a multigenerational household,” explains Tom. “It also makes it convenient for the adult child to support their parents as they age. Many families see the benefit of having grandparents help with child care, which saves on child care expenses. In many ways, it’s a win-win.”

Tom knows firsthand—she lived with her grandparents from birth until age 26, when they passed away at ages 98 and 102.

A page out of other cultures’ books

Of course, this arrangement isn’t new everywhere. Many cultures around the world—from Latin America to Asia to parts of Europe—are familiar with big families living under one roof. Multigenerational living has always been the norm there.

It’s primarily in the United States where the nuclear family model became standard in the mid-20th century. Now, economic pressures and a renewed appreciation for family support systems are bringing Americans back to a more traditional living arrangement that much of the world never abandoned.

There are major perks of sharing a space with family

For the Pingrees, the benefits have been both expected and surprising—it’s so much more than just shared Wi-Fi.

Cheaper housing

This may be the top appeal for many people, and it’s true—combining households often leads to lower living expenses, whether rent or a mortgage. While the brothers do pay rent to their parents, they get it at a lower-than-market rate.

“I have to acknowledge how lucky and privileged we are to have this opportunity,” Pingree says. “The financial benefits are incredible. But honestly, the social, emotional and practical benefits are what make it more than worth it.”

Shared expenses

The financial benefits extend past rent and into utilities, child care, grocery bills and beyond. The Pingrees split all their household bills, including internet, utilities, streaming services, grocery deliveries, tools and yes, even refrigerator space sometimes. Small savings add up quickly when you’re pooling resources across three households.

Help with little ones

With six other adults in the immediate vicinity, school pickups and last-minute child care needs aren’t the logistical nightmares they are for most parents. “Today, actually, my parents are picking up the kids from school because my wife and I both have meetings,” Pingree says. “It’s so nice not to have to stress about scheduling as much as other parents.”

Built-in best friends

The brothers were inseparable growing up, and they’ve passed that bond to their kids. Ten cousins means built-in playmates, quadruple the toys and enough people to make a small sports team.

A village of role models

With grandparents, aunts and uncles constantly around, the kids have multiple sources of attention, wisdom and love. “Kids require so much attention, and parents often feel spread thin,” Pingree says. “Having other adults who love them just as much really helps.”

Tom experienced this growing up. “As a child with ADHD, I so appreciate having [had] two additional adults in my life to nurture and encourage me,” she says. “My grandparents gave me an extra layer of love, attention and availability.”

Opportunities to work together

Learning how to work well with others—communicate, compromise, compliment—is a major life skill and one Tom also credits her grandparents with teaching her. “Some of the benefits were that, as a child, I learned that life did not revolve around me simply by living with older people. In many ways, it teaches you how to work and live with people who are very different from yourselves.”

Elder care

Pingree’s parents, now in their 80s, need extra support—especially since Grandma Pingree was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease in 2022. Having three sons and their families nearby means help is always available for groceries, repairs and daily tasks. Pingree’s oldest child has become particularly close with his grandmother, helping keep her company most days.

“There aren’t many hobbies my mom can do anymore, but just having the little ones playing around her brings her so much joy,” Pingree says.

An in-house expert for everything

Between the three families, you’ve got two doctors, a nurse practitioner, an architect, a financial advisor, a carpenter and an entrepreneur. Middle-of-the-night fever? Covered. Burst pipe? On it. The kids get to learn from professionals in every field imaginable—no Google required. (Plus, there is a shared workshop in the basement with plenty of communal tools.)

Cultural legacy

Tom discovered additional advantages she hadn’t anticipated as a child. “Culturally speaking, living with my Mama and Yeye is the only reason I can speak Cantonese because this is the language my grandparents spoke,” she says. “While I always loved my grandparents, I didn’t fully appreciate this gift until I became an adult and parent myself.”

Maximum flexibility

When Grandma Pingree’s needs increased, the families simply switched apartments. Pingree’s growing family moved up to the more spacious top floor, while his parents moved to a ground-floor unit that the architect brother renovated to meet their aging needs. Try doing that when everyone lives in different ZIP codes.

But the arrangement has its challenges

Let’s be real: Cramming three families into one building isn’t always harmonious. It’s not all Sunday dinners and shared Netflix. People living in multigenerational homes, like the Pingrees, still clash from time to time. The factors below are all common challenges.

The eventual role reversal

“Sometimes there are concerns about how much time kids are spending at—and messing up—one house or planning for my mom’s increasing medical needs,” Pingree admits. “These can be really difficult conversations, and we’re not always the best at having them.”

The role reversal has been particularly hard on Pingree’s father. “He and my mom worked hand-in-hand as the co-heads of the family. With her decline, he’s had to learn to trust us to handle things, to be more patient.” Now, Pingree manages his parents’ finances and serves as their dedicated tech support (a role every millennial child knows well).

Unavoidable personality clashes

And of course, nobody knows how to push your buttons quite like your siblings. There are squabbles. There are disagreements. There are probably moments when someone’s thinking, Why did we agree to this again?

Tom is candid about the challenges. “Living with others is hard,” she says. “Multigenerational living is extremely challenging because any time you add another adult into a living environment, relational dynamics in the home get more complex and complicated. It is also hard to set boundaries when you live with others and when you’re from the same family.”

Fuel for unresolved issues

She adds that unresolved family issues can make things particularly difficult. “Everyday life is particularly challenging and involves a lot of conflict when family members come into a multigenerational living situation with unprocessed emotions and unresolved conflict,” she explains. “I think it is the most challenging and stressful for the adult child.”

Even Tom, who looks back fondly on living with her grandparents, remembers difficult moments. “While I always loved my grandparents, at times I resented them and did not like the attention my grandparents gave me,” she admits. “I was the highlight of their day, and they would often hover over me.”

But for those who live in multigenerational homes, the challenges are well worth it in the end. “We all come together and work through it eventually,” Pingree says of his family’s conflicts. “We’re all invested in making this work.”

Living together can transform family relationships

Talk of multigenerational homes often hinges on economics—no big surprise, considering the high cost of living. But what often gets lost among all those numbers is the heart of the trend: the rich family relationships that form in a multigenerational home.

For Pingree, the arrangement has deepened bonds across generations. His children have relationships with their grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins that would be impossible to maintain with geographic distance. His parents get daily interaction and purpose. And the brothers, already close, have become true partners in navigating life’s challenges together.

“It’s influenced every aspect of my life in positive ways,” Pingree reflects. “It even shaped my work—it inspired me to start Kinsome.” Kinsome is a business originally dedicated to helping grandchildren maintain long-distance relationships with their grandparents and has since expanded to helping children with autism build meaningful relationships.

The experience has also taught the whole family important lessons about communication, patience and compromise. “We’ve had to learn how to have difficult conversations,” Pingree says. “We’re getting better at it.”

Multigenerational homes take work

After 13 years of trial and error, the Pingrees have developed their own set of best practices. Tom, drawing on both her personal experience and her work helping families connect across generations, offers similar advice:

  • Set up separate spaces. This is nonnegotiable. Each family needs its own apartment with doors that lock. Privacy matters. “This is essential,” Tom emphasizes.
  • Start with emotional health. “Multigenerational families are the healthiest and most successful when the adults in the house are emotionally healthy people and do not have unresolved conflict between each other,” Tom says. If there are long-standing family issues, address them before moving in together.
  • Make sure both partners agree. “If adult children are married, they should only move into a multigenerational family situation if both parties are on the same page,” Tom advises.
  • Have the hard conversations early. “Families should see it as a benefit to have as many difficult conversations as they can with each other before moving in together,” Tom says. “Parents and grandparents should discuss everything from expectations about finances, house responsibilities, boundaries and roles to end-of-life decision-making with each other. Honesty is so important.”
  • Communicate constantly. The Pingrees use multiple channels—text, group chats, face-to-face communication—to stay coordinated. “Regular and consistent communication between parents, grandparents and children is essential in order to minimize the family drama that most people are afraid of,” Tom adds.
  • Respect boundaries. Just because you can knock on someone’s door any time doesn’t mean you should. “An adult child would benefit if they evaluate and seek the counsel of close family and friends as to whether they are good at setting healthy boundaries or whether they are good communicators before moving into a multigenerational living environment,” Tom says.
  • Make time for togetherness. Regular family gatherings keep everyone connected and help prevent resentment.
  • Plan ahead when possible. Give advance notice for requests. Don’t assume someone’s always available.
  • Practice basic courtesy. Ask politely. Say thank you. Repeat. Basic manners go a long way when you’re seeing one another every single day.

The future is the family

The Pingrees have no plans to change their living situation any time soon. With his mother’s health challenges and his father aging, Pingree expects they’ll continue this arrangement for the foreseeable future—and he’s happy about that.

“We didn’t exactly plan it this way,” Pingree reflects, “but it really ended up being the best of all worlds. I’m grateful every day that we did this.”

For families considering a similar move, both Pingree and Tom emphasize that while it’s not always easy, the rewards can be profound.

“Now as an adult and parent, living with my grandparents is one of the greatest blessings I’ve been given in life,” Tom says, looking back on her 26 years in a multigenerational home.

In an era of increasing isolation and economic pressure, perhaps the Pingrees and families like them are showing us a path forward—one that looks a lot like the way humans lived for most of history, with multiple generations sharing not just a roof but also their lives.

About the experts

  • Eben Pingree is the founder of Kinsome, a company dedicated to helping children with autism build meaningful relationships. A Boston resident, he lives with his wife and three children in a multigenerational family compound in Beacon Hill, where he’s resided for the past 13 years alongside his parents, brothers and their families—10 grandchildren in total. His passion for intergenerational connections grew directly from his own experience living in close proximity to extended family.
  • Isabel Tom is the author of The Value of Wrinkles: A Young Perspective on How Loving the Old Will Change Your Life and creator of the Grandkid Investigator Kit, a program that helps children build relationships with older adults. Based in Maryland, Tom lived with her grandparents from birth until age 26, when they passed away. She credits this multigenerational upbringing with teaching her Cantonese, providing extra support for her ADHD and shaping her understanding of family dynamics. Now a parent herself, she advocates for the benefits of multigenerational living while acknowledging its challenges.

Why trust us

For over 100 years, Reader’s Digest has explored the nuances of relationships, working with such luminaries as Dr. Ruth Westheimer, John Gottman, PhD, and Leo Buscaglia (“Dr. Love”). We ran a decade-long relationships column and have published a compendium of features, Love and Marriage: The Reader’s Digest Guide to Intimate Relationships. For this piece on multigenerational homes, Charlotte Hilton Andersen tapped her experience as a longtime journalist who regularly reports on relationships for Reader’s Digest to ensure that all information is accurate and offers the best possible advice to readers. We support this information with credentialed experts and primary sources such as government and professional organizations, peer-reviewed journals and our writers’ personal experiences where it enhances the topic. We verify all facts and data and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

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